This is Not Your Father’s Chemo

When I tell people that I am taking chemotherapy, they sometimes look at me a little funny thinking that I should be a lot sicker than I am.  I can understand why they would feel that way if they have seen someone go through chemo procedures at some time in the past.  It just is not the case anymore.

My father was wonderful man who passes away about 15 years ago from acute leukemia.  He made a conscious choice not to take chemotherapy because he had seen what the “cure” did to his friends.  He decided that he did not want to live as he saw them live after they had taken chemo.  I never questioned my father’s decision then, nor do I do it now.  At the time and with his age, that seemed to have been the logical choice.

What chemo does and how it works has changed so much in recent years.  Yes, there are chemotherapy drugs that devastate people and make them weak, and vomit, and loose their hair.  Taking the drugs plus the radiation or possible surgery that is often needed can make life brutal for a time.  Unfortunately, these procedures are necessary when cancer has progressed rapidly or has not been caught early.

Fortunately, there is another side.  Many of the chemo cocktails mixed do not have the harsh side effects.  The chemo regimen that I take for MDS leaves my hair and only gives some nausea.  The drugs tend to target a specific problem and do not have the overall body impact of the drugs of the past.  People tend to be able to carry on with their lives rather than be bed-ridden or in a catatonic state.

Are the new drugs perfect with few repercussions?  I don’t think that is a true statement yet, but the drugs keep improving all of the time.  I was reading an article in the March 22 issue of Forbes where scientists are looking at miracle cures.  What they are finding that stimulating the person’s immune system to have the body heal itself is what the scientists are currently thinking.  So far a small percentage of people responded to the immune stimulus drugs, but hope abounds with the new cocktails.

I still believe that the hand of God is in the chemo drugs and the person prescribing them.  I don’t think anything escapes His eyes particularly for those who love Him and know Him.  I still know who the healer is and the power that He wields throughout the universe.  I am grateful that He is allowing scientists to investigate these new areas.

Are You Scared?

I try not to let anyone sit alone in an oncology waiting room.  For whatever reason, the Lord has made me particularly chatty at this time in my life.  The people that I most like to talk to are the young people.  I look for the one’s that seem to be sitting the room in fear, the ones where this is their first visit.  I usually ask them this question, “Are you scared?”

Cancer scares us to death.  When we hear the “C” word we think of nothing but bad things particularly if we have seen a lot of cancer in our family.  Scripture says that perfect love drives out all fear.  That scripture is far easier to say than to implement in our lives.

After we get over the initial shock of hearing that we have cancer, most of us go through stages in dealing with the event.  Elizabeth Kubler-Ross describes the steps that we go through in facing death and they seem to apply here.  Her stages are:

• Denial – We just don’t believe that the condition exists.  Unfortunately this keeps some people from getting their diagnosis confirmed and action to be taken.
• Anger – Nearly everyone that I talk to has been angry at someone or something or God or in many cases themselves.
• Bargaining – This is a stage where we begin to subtly or openly bargain, usually with God, for some kind of healing.
• Depression – When the thought finally sets in that we have cancer and we have to go through the cure without a guaranteed outcome, we get very sad if not depressed.  This lasts a long time for some and not so long for others.
• Acceptance – If we are going to have any chance at being healthy in our journey you have to get to the point of accepting the cancer and your own mortality.  This stage is crucial to attain peace throughout the process.

Maybe you will have all of the stages, maybe few, or perhaps none.  The point is that fear of the unknown that you face is a very real thing that you need to accept it and deal with it.  Facing the truth of what is happening to you moves you towards fully accepting what life now has in store for you.

There are scriptures and promises of God that apply here.  “I will never leave you nor forsake you”, “Your name is written in the palm of My hand”, “Call on Me and I will answer”, and “Come to Me all who are heavy laden and I will give you rest”.  These will come to mind at the oddest times in your journey.  Let Him work with your heart through this.  That’s how the perfect love cases out all fear.

There Has Never Been a Better Time to Have Cancer

When I make this statement that is the title to people, they kind of look at me funny, particularly if they do not have cancer.  Cancer is still a killer and we still run in fear of having it.  We have seen way too many people die, usually in our families.  The thought of having cancer is terrifying, but there is much hope on the horizon.

At the same time medical science continues to progress in knowledge and treatments.  20 years ago, the cancer that I had, multiple myeloma, was a death sentence.  Now the survival rate is over 50%.  My grandmother died of it when I was 12.

I talked with a family in the oncology waiting room whose son had liver cancer.  They talked about an experimental procedure that was working where they planted radio isotopes in his liver where the cancer cells were and the isotopes were killing the cancer.  They talked about another procedure that does the same thing without the radiation.  A deadly killer like liver cancer might be finally submitting to treatment.

There are hundreds of kinds of cancer.  I cannot find a doctor who can give me a number.  The point is that each of the different cancers requires different treatments rather than treating it like one disease.  By separating them out or grouping them, researchers and physicians can focus on specific ones and specialize in treatment.

New drugs keep coming.  Chemotherapy is not chemotherapy any more.  Drugs are very targeted and specialized and the drugs perform miraculous things.  Each patient gets his or her specific combination to target the disease that they have.  Most drugs that I have encountered allow the patient to maintain a fairly high quality of life while they are on them.

There is no question people are still dying from cancer.  We can see them in our life.  But the amount of people living through or living with the disease is steadily increasing.  I see this trend continuing.  It no longer means death.  It probably means that you have to adjust your priorities in life, but it is not a death sentence.  There is life after cancer.  Many of my friends and I can attest to that.

Cancer, Christian Faith and You

I started this blog to chronicle some of my adventures in my journey through cancer and MDS.  I thought that I would try to share what I have learned and talk about how my faith in Jesus Christ has sustained me.  Also, I will probably write about some of the people, my heroes, whom I have encountered along the way.  I am trying to share a joy that I have found in this process, so here goes.

I am a cancer survivor and a born again Christian.  That may offend some and that is unfortunate because I do not apologize for it.  I have found my Christian faith to be comforting in my journey through cancer and now with a disease called MDS.  My journey continues.

I don’t find many people without faith in oncology clinics.  Their faith seems to give them a cheerful and peaceful demeanor that affects the entire room.  The jokes are many and the conversation is truthful.  All people going through various cancer stages seem to be resting on something that they cannot completely explain.  They are content in where they are going and seem to be trying to enjoy the most this day has to offer.

I don’t find this true of the people who do not have faith.  Many without faith seem to have and anger and ugliness that spreads out from them. I have talked with some of them and they are angry at their condition and at any higher power that might allow it to happen.  They have no peace and no joy, but that, of course, is their choice.

Cancer makes us face our mortality.  I wish that I could get people to this point without them having to go through the cancer, radiation, and chemotherapy. I don’t know how to explain it to them so that they would get it.  I am not sure why people need the kind of shock that cancer provides in their life in order for them to get it, but is the way that it is.

I’ll try to post to this blog frequently, possible three times a week.  I hope that you will respond with your own story and comments.  That way we can share the things that you have learned on your journey and all of us will be more enriched by it.