I remember when Nellie, the Physician’s Assistant at my oncologist’s office, started me on thalidomide to begin my cancer cure. She said to me, “You are going to have some of the best sleep that you have ever had.” I did not think much about it at the time but it has taken on a bit more meaning as I have gone through the healing process.
I had never slept very well for much of my life. I often woke up very early in the morning and could not go back to sleep. Four or five hour nights of sleep were common for me. But one of the side effects of this drug, thalidomide, was gentle and restful sleep and I will say that was good, very good. Rest for the body speeds the healing process. Maybe that’s why we tend to sleep so much after surgeries and other trauma that happens to our body.
The other side effect of the drugs that we take can give us restless sleep as well. This side effect I learned about from Anne whom I met in the oncology clinic. She was dealing with the after effects of a colonoscopy and surgery. Her chemotherapy treatment gave her restless sleep. I remember her saying, “If I could just get four hours of continuous sleep, it would be great.”
My oncologist just changed the drug regimen that he is using the treat my MDS. The chemo procedure looked favorable for a time but in the end was not the solution. Now I am on steroids and vitamins which I had mentioned before. The effect on sleep has been drastic. I am almost in whiplash from in going from general malaise condition under the chemo to being over stimulated on the steroids. I now sleep about two hours a night. I catch small “cat naps” during the day or if I can get back to sleep in the night. I have more energy than I may have ever had in my life.
I don’t know if you or I will ever sleep right again. I am not sure that I slept right before I had cancer and MDS. We are so different in our sleep patterns and the effect that too little sleep has on us. When we inject harsh drugs into our systems to keep us alive, we have to deal with what comes our way.
What we fail to see is that we are not who we were. Radical things have happened to our bodies and they are not the same. But the Lord has made radical things happen to our soul and spirit during the same process of physical healing. We are brand new. The new normal that we have become has new characteristics associated with it. One of those things may be changes in sleep patterns. But during that time the Lord has given me a closer insight to Him and things of Him and His true desire to be involved in all aspects of my life. I pray that I will always be able to embrace the change that He allows in my life.
Cancer Faith and You 